i created my own drama

so i was sick, n still am, though i hate to be cos it sucks. my whole system feels all crappy n its such an indescribable feeling that when nikita asked - how do i feel - i gave her a one word answer - complicated -

it all started off with some minor purging on noon friday after my Service Learning electives (damn i was suffering in there k!) luckily Quinn's Sch Of Business is right beside Merville so i managed to get home n .. ok, lets not get into details.

then on Sat night, everything just went downhill. i shivered, no, i shook.. yes, shook - like a drug addict (at least thats how i portray them to be when they're high) over the night so i got up n took a paracetamol n texted Grace at about 5am to briefly let her know that i'm not really feeling well. i couldnt even hold my cell properly...

Sunday morn was a huge blur, i couldnt stand, couldnt even sit up, my head was spinning n i just didnt haf d balance so i slept through the whole day. at the same time, my sinus is just getting really bad i can hardly breathe already.. n cos its this bad naughty viral sinus, it got to my head, forehead, wherever it can go n caused a huge pain there.. so besides waking up for medicine i did nothing else. oh, n christine cooked some porridge for me, with mushrooms, carrots, scallops n some either chicken or pork i haf no clue of.

Monday was equally bad. this time i only survived on biscuits n milk Grace brought over.. n i thought i was feeling slightly better in the evening, i cooked my seafood noodles but never even ate half of the whole packet. by then, i was also sick of sleeping, so i started watching some tvb drama called The Ultimate Crime Fighter which only made me feel worse because they had so many ppl dying in the first 4 episodes. now thats not exactly one of the best things to watch when u're so under the weather..

Tuesday came.. it was raining. i told myself no matter what i need to brave myself n walk to the health centre some 30 minutes of baby steps away. thought of attending my one single class of the day at 11 but decided against it in d last minute n boy, it was a damn good decision. at 11.30, i puked big time. i only had a slice of bread n milk, so guess what came out. thank goodness i got ready my lifesaver my pail in my room since the last few days cos that - complicated - feeling i've got is just damn bothering! go away! anyway, i thought i was the hero after puking so i washed up the pail n cleaned it, put on 3 layers of clothes excluding my bra (cos according to some people bras account for 1 layer, omglah!), hoodie and another layer of jacket n set out to the health centre with my red umbrella. i swear the weather had to be extra windy that day. anyway, by the time i was 3/4 there, the - i wanna faint - feeling came. Met a groupmate on the way and while talking like few words to her, i could almost feel myself swaying sideways, front ways, backways so i said goodbye n continued taking my baby steps. n when i finaaaalllyyy reached the student centre i just reached for the nearest chair. my pulse was racing, my head was spinning, my forehead was burning but my limbs were shivering ... i reached for my phone. *Christine, where are you? i'm in student centre now. come quick i think i'm gonna faint soon* before i knew it, there were like 5 ppl around me already - i think Tegpal, Ajay, Peng Wei, Sue a 3rd year, Charles a 2nd year and i cant remember who else - and there was me holdin onto my other lifesaver my Reads plastic bag.

so before i create more drama where theres so many ppl around, christine n Sue brought me up to the health centre where i freaking waited for a doctor for TWO freaking hours! now i understand why people tell me Irish healthcare system is not one of the best. n yup, i puked again there, practically nothing much came out cos i nvr drank nor ate anything, just sips of water. n then went for the check up. Dr Sandra said its viral sinus, something like that thats causing this whole episode and while checking me discovered some ectopic heart beats so she suggested me to go for an ECG at St Vincents Uni Hosp (SVUH - i think its one of the best hospitals in Dublin) when i'm better.

Let me go off the topic a while... Last Friday afternoon after Service Learning n after my toilet experience i ran all d way back to Health Science for my ECG practical with Dr Stuart Bund, hence i can proudly say i now know how to operate an ECG machine. in this practical, our male groupmate was the subject and we're supposed to place the round things with gel on his chest. Dr Bund here actually made a remark that made me realise something. He said "common, u guys are gonna be doctors. surely u haf to get used to touching a human's body?" and it hit me!! how come i can touch a cadaver's body so well, feel it, play with the skin, the everything but yet, ALL of us find it so hard to be the first to touch Conor's chest to feel for his fourth thoracic n so on? i mean common, its Conor-lah! Alive, warm and breathing.. wif loads of chest bulu summore!

i actually need to rest now. the real drama begins after this. to be continued.